Love Can't Wait

Recent events in my life have sparked my thoughts about inequality in society right now.  I just dealt with some raging sexism at work and I realized it was the first time that I had personally dealt with the effects of inequality. I knew that we needed feminism and I’ve been an open supporter of it since I was little, but I was always coming from an outside perspective.  Now that I can say that I have been personally affected by sexism, I understand in a very minor way what the problem is.  A lot of people that aren’t supporters of feminism and think we’re already fixed don’t understand the effect it has on people.  The same thing happens with the LGBT community.  I have some real life experience that I can share with all of you about the bullying in schools towards gay people. 

During my senior year of high school, there was this boy who gave my friend and me a particularly hard time.  As us girls who are very close, hetero or not, we hold hands.  It was not uncommon for my friend and me to walk to our next class hand in hand.  We were not a couple, just really comfortable being as close as we were.  Every so often, after our lunch period, we would have an unpleasant encounter. 

One day in particular I remember, we were walking down a hall with very few people in it and from behind us came this boy who went right between us knocking our hands apart.  It wasn’t crowded in the hall so he had plenty of room to walk around us.  This sort of thing happened a few times and looking back at it now, I probably should have done something more than saying “What the f***?” because I can only hope that he will not do that to other people.  We thought it was rude and homophobic but we weren’t hurt by it so we didn't do anything.  

One other incident that only I experienced one time happened when I was walking to class alone in a hallway and he was coming in the opposite direction.  As we passed each other, he turned to me and said “Dyke,” then walked away.  As a person who doesn’t offend easily I kept walking and laughed it off, but I always worry that I wasn’t his only target and he was taking it easy on me.  There were plenty of other people in the school that were gay and I regret a lot that I didn’t do anything to stop him.  I might be lucky enough to have thick skin, but not everyone is. 

Whenever people say that we don’t have to protect the LGBT community, that they chose this life and need to deal with it alone, I’m always very upset by that.  Some states don’t include gay people in policies protecting from harassment, Indiana can refuse service, and now someone wants a bill passed that legalizes shooting gays in the head.  

Why in the world are people so offended by the idea that someone wants to kiss the same gender that they think murder is acceptable? I will never fully understand it and it terrifies me.  I am scared for the people involved in hate crimes and I am extremely upset for people who feel like they don't belong in this world.  Believe me, you do. Much more than someone who wants you out of it. 

I really hope that that boy either stopped or was stopped and that he didn’t make someone’s life miserable.  I say this as an apology to whoever has to deal with people like this.  I’m sorry I didn’t do anything then.  I also say this as a message to people who see this happening and I urge you to say something. As for the people who are perpetrators of harassment or worse.  You spend such a short time on this planet.  How about you focus some energy on healing it, not hurting it.