Dating Myself

So I just got back from having a really nice date with a really cool person. We really hit it off. I feel like I’ve known her my whole life…

In all sincerity, it was actually surprisingly enjoyable. A couple of days ago, I decided to take myself to see Hotel Transylvania 2 because it was something that I, a fully grown woman, had never done before. For some reason, I felt like it was really important. Like if I could do this one thing, I could do anything, which is probably pretty weird, but it’s how I felt! I got the movie ticket on Sunday and at first I was kind of nervous. I thought people might question me or stare or something, I don’t know why. I made up fake excuses why I was alone in case anyone asked.

Monday I felt anxious, both nervous still but I was pretty excited. This morning I woke up really looking forward to it, and now I am planning what movie I want to see alone next.  It was oddly exhilarating and I will share with you the good and the weird, but I am glad to say there wasn’t a bad to share.

The first weird thing was getting an email receipt that said, and I quote, “1 Tickets to see Hotel Transylvania 2” which I found amusing. Obviously this is not something common enough for the automated services to have customary grammar applied. Maybe it’s not weird to everyone, but I laughed. The only other weird part was actually walking into the theater alone and handing my ticket to the guy. It made me feel vulnerable.

The cool part about it was that I felt freer to laugh at the stupid trailers. Without having someone else there, I got to see my honest reactions to things. I didn’t have a distraction from myself; no one else’s opinions were affecting mine. It was just unadulterated me.

As for the movie itself, it was really fun. There is some pop culture humor that was a little lame, but the premise of the movie is sweet and it’s a good kid’s movie. I would for sure see it again. Oh! And the bonus of going to see a movie for kids is that they don’t play a half an hour of trailers!

For those who have never ventured out to a movie alone, what are you waiting for?! It’s really enjoyable. Maybe next time I shall take myself out to dinner as well. 

Music is Magic | Cover Songs from Last Night

I am so blessed to be able to share music with people. I covered "Gravity" by Sara Bareilles and "Arms" by Christina Perri last night and it was beautiful. I wish I could bottle up these moments. 

I am currently in the very slow process of putting together an album of my original songs. I am hoping to set a deadline and as soon as that exists, you'll be the first to know. 

xoxo

Walkin in a Dairy-Free Wonderland

So if you've followed my posts from the beginning, you may know that I have the unfortunate ability to turn any form of dairy product into human waste in an immeasurable amount (sorry that was gross). But thank the deities that we live in an era obsessed with everything-free. Soy-free, GMO-free, gluten free, and my absolute favorite, dairy-free.

Many a person who takes my order will be perplexed when I inquire if their items have butter/milk etc. in them. They'll say something like "No, but don't you need a gluten free bun?" or "The only thing that has dairy is the mayo".  I've grown patience with the people who try to separate mayo from me. No, mayo doesn't have dairy. No, egg doesn't count as dairy. Yes, I'm very sure it doesn't have dairy.

There it is, right next to some beans and a roasted chicken. So put some damn mayo on my burger!

So now back to the point of my blog. I have some things dairy free that, regardless of your current diet, you MUST HAVE. Whenever I find something diary free that I like, I get kind of obsessed with it. I really hope for those of you who may be part of the No Lactose Club, that this helps you deal with saying goodbye to certain foods.

First up is this "brownie" bar. I first got these camping because all we did was sit around the fire and eat food and I wanted something chocolaty to have when my boyfriend was making s'mores. They are amazing. It has simple and healthy ingredients that are soooo good. I was recently flying cross country and I was desperately looking for a quick snack before the plane took off and I had checked virtually every little food hub in Minnesota, and as I was near tears and about to give up, I found these bars. They are extremely filling for such a small bar. UGH! I love them.

As a kind/teen I was sort of addicted to Doritos until I got a sulfite-attack/allergic reaction after eating nearly the whole bag. When I found these Quinoa Puffs, I was instantly in love. I ate the entire bag and I felt GREAT. Then I felt sad because I only bought one. If anyone wants to get me the best Christmas present, fill my entire room and I would be on cloud nine. They come in a couple other dairy free flavors, but I like the spicy ones.

This one isn't exactly dairy free specific, but I added it on here for people who might want an alternative for pop. I know that pop (soda) is quite literally addictive and from the bottom of my heart, I hope you stop drinking it for the sake of your own health who ever is reading this right now. If you force yourself to get something like Honest Tea any time you're inclined to buy a bottle of pop, your body will be so happy. I pinky promise!

Ditto for this drink. Plus, sometimes it's pink which is fun!

Finding good cereal is a struggle for me, but this one pleasantly surprised me. It has very basic ingredients and a little bit of pomegranate that gives it natural sweetness. I don't like having heavy corn syrup or gross additives at all, but especially in the morning because everything is so sensitive in my belly. I would suggest this to really anyone, not just dairy free friends.

 Alright, let's get real for a second. I'm from Buffalo, so wings are a MUST, especially now that it's football season. Pigging out is healthy sometimes. When people go one diets, they can get so miserable from all the cravings they get, but honestly it's better to give yourself some cheat meals once in a while. Otherwise no one is happy. Eat the damn chicken wings, they make you happy! (Make sure they use oil, not butter to toss with the hot sauce).

Last, but certainly not least (actually the best). Ice cream. So Delicious is probably my favorite brand for ice creams. They have bars, and pints and sandwiches. Sweets are essential. Even if you're a firm believer in non-vegan desserts (good for you for reading this whole blog if that's the case) you should still try some of these things. They are healthier for you and I might even dare to say that they taste better than the real stuff.

If you guys have any other dairy free treats, PLEASE let me know. Email me, Facebook me, stalk me, I don't care, I love food. (actually, please don't stalk me.)

For those who know how nuts I got last year, Halloweek is near and if you have any suggestions or requests for crafts, costumes I would love to hear about it.
xoxo

Music Review- Miley Cyrus and her Dead Petz

Alright, before we get started we should all just leave everything we think about Miley at the door (well, your other browser window that you clicked on this from). Just have an open mind.

Before I go into my favorite tracks from her new free album, I’m going to lay down the possible reasons that you might dislike Miley Cyrus.

Maybe you don’t like her because she’s profane. Okay, I guess that’s a fair complaint. It’s usually not socially appropriate to drop f-bombs, but you should note that Miley doesn’t really use hurtful words towards other people. She isn’t a malignant swearer (I made that word up).

Perhaps it’s Miley’s near-constant nudity that you dislike, or the fact that she is an advocate for smoking marijuana. All I will say for that is, I know for a fact you’re naked under your clothes. And it’s hard to get genuinely upset at someone who burns a plant to inhale then stares at their living room wall all day then writes a song about it.  

Okay! Now that that is out of the way, I shall share with you my top 7 favorite tracks.

“Pablow the Blowfish”

My list wouldn’t be complete without a song that actually references one of her dead pets. When you listen to the song, you need to really be open to unconventional lyrics. They seem silly and half-assed but they’re actually very heartfelt and genuine. I’m not going to lie, I cried the first time I listened to the song. It is heart wrenching, hearing about this little fish dude.

“The Floyd Song (Sunrise)”

In a more metaphoric way, Miley sings about her beautiful puppy who was mauled by coyotes last year ish and I have to say, it is one of the most beautiful songs I have heard Miley do. It has such an impenetrable ambiance that is reminiscent of how you feel when you’re grieving over a death. If there was one song that I would want everyone to give a chance from this album, it would be this song.

“BB Talk”

I really appreciate this song because it is so different from what you hear pop artists do. I’m sure the idea isn’t totally new, but instead of formulaic verses, Miley just gets a dialogue going and it works for me. She swears a lot, but it’s enjoyable for those who are curious about what people actually think. Miley certainly does not hold back.

“I Get So Scared”

I picked this song because it is vulnerable Miley in a really honest way. It’s relatable and the form is familiar to pop-loving ears. I listen to it a lot I think that probably most everyone knows exactly what she is singing about.

“Twinkle Song”

I’ll be honest; I listen to this song because it makes me giggle. The lyrics are very…stoner? Yea I’ll go with that. But also Miley rips into the chorus with a vengeance. It is pretty epic.

“Cyrus Skies”

Only for the daring. This song is really weird, I’ll tell you that right away. I won’t say much in hopes that your curiosity will get the best of you (is it working?).

“Miley Tibetan Bowlzzz”

This is actually fairly experimental avant-garde for a “pop” album in my opinion. It works for me. It’s like Cyrus-ified (I made that word up) yoga music. It’s hypnotic.

What more can I say? Go check out the album and maybe peruse her website and discover that she’s quite the philanthropist. (She founded a charity and started a MAC line to raise funds for AIDS).

Viva la Miley.

AMERICAN ULTRA IS NOT JUST ANOTHER STONER COMEDY

Oh my, internet friends, have I just seen a movie.

If you have ventured into other realms besides my blog page, you’ve most likely seen advertisements for American Ultra, a badass movie that includes this generations most awkward yet elegantly witty actor Jesse Eisenberg  starring with equally talented Kristen Stewart. If you have yet to watch a film with these two, you need to go watch Adventureland (which is on Netflix!) right now. Shut your phone/computer/tablet/etc. and watch that movie. Be satisfied with rare natural onscreen chemistry, then come back to my post and continue to listen to me glorify them and their new film. Okay? Cool. 

I trust that if you’re reading this far, you have either already seen Adventureland (kudos to you, my friend) or you just came back from a nice Netflix adventure.

Back to American Ultra: OKAY!

What I really found that I most appreciated about this film was that it found a way to sort of break the mold of its genre.  I flirted with clichés of movie making, but in a fresh way, which is exactly what good artists do. You watch Nicholas Sparks’ adaptation movies and you feel the formula that they push over and over, and it works.  On the other hand, you watch something like This Is the End and the Neighbors and you feel they avoid clichés in all the wrong ways. American Ultra doesn’t do either. It gives moments of familiarity and adds uniqueness. I think that’s because its well written, well conceived, and the cast consists of all very smart actors who understand comedy.

If you like movies that get you to laugh without using slapstick or crude/lame jokes, you’ll definitely enjoy this one.  It was exciting in an extremely human way. There are some very real moments that are raw and naturally captivating. I love when I’m watching movies and I’m almost bouncing in my seat because I connect with the emotions the characters feel.  This is the kind of movie that when someone is yelling in distress, you just want them to yell louder and get angrier. It is a success when you get excited by things like this and you get to forget that it’s just a movie. I caught myself sitting there in the theater tonight, not blinking, and terse. If you have any preconceived notions that this is just another stupid stoner flick, don’t buy into that. Go see what really good films look like. Go celebrate the artists’ triumph. Success is rare. American Ultra is guilty of that achievement.

I just got really sappy about a movie again, didn’t I? Okay…

Guide to Becoming a Grownup

Welcome to Julia’s internet self-help guide for new big kids on pretending to fit in with the other big kids.

Ready for adulthood? Me neither. Great! Let’s get started.

Today’s question comes from my brain.

Dear Julia,
What’s the first step to fitting in with other grownups?
Love, Julia.

Well, Julia the first step of fitting into anything is to pretend you already do. Next time you’re at family dinner, you don’t wait to be seated at the big kids’ table. You move your name place from that tiny fold out card table with the bulky plastic chairs and smack it down with purpose next to a wine glass and say, “I’d like a scotch on the rocks with a twist, Betty,” to your aunt (which is what Monica drinks on Friends so you know it’s a real drink) because adults do things with purpose and confidence (Also don’t be nervous about the rocks. They’re probably not real rocks).

To fit into a grownup’s natural habitat, you must perfect the art of blending. Repeat after me: To blend is to pretend. Over and over. That’s your new mantra for adulting. Applied to a situation, it works like this… You’re at a party and adults are talking about adult stuff. You must now conform your conversation to match their adulting. Kim might say “I am so disappointed in the candidates for presidents this year,” and you must blend. Saying you like someone will isolate you from adults. You must pretend to dislike. Even take it up a notch. Be even grumpier about the presidential election (adults like grumpy people).

Now, if your first attempt at adulting fails, just go home and continue binge watching Netflix. Because adults are mean, and OITNB is not. 

My First Performance!

Yesterday I had a magical first gig at a restaurant in Youngstown, NY.
Here's a clip from my night.
Enjoy (and share it). (*Subliminal peer pressure to share my video..*)

XOXO